Surfing through an internet chatroom on computer games that had been ‘seeded’ by some flunky asking for opinions on a new Axe fragrance, I was touched by one respondent who proudly declared his preference for Slazenger deodorant: “This is what the Pros smell like.”

Here in Southern Europe (and it doesn’t come much more southern than Cyprus) men clearly respond equally well to scents endorsed by Sports brands, though I wonder if this store will ever shift those cans of adidas ‘Fair Play’ 2008.

The more up-to-date variants are also rather uninspiring both in design and naming – ‘Dynamic Pulse’, ‘Team Force’, ‘Deep Energy’, ‘Fresh Impact’ and ‘Ice Dive’ promised little and looked like even less.

Avoiding the homophobic sounding local brand STR8, I’ve gone for Nivea Menergy, in ‘Rebellious’ fragrance and with a cap that shouts: ‘YOU ROCK’. Sold.